Not Self Sufficient Living My Best Life

I Do Not Have To Go It Alone!

Published by Deborah Negron  – Child of God by His Mercy and Grace

November 14, 2022

The Fragility of Life
We make plans. We make decisions. We walk and speak and consider ourselves so capable at times.
This is life. God has afforded us moments of great successes and times of deep and dark valleys. We all experience loss and failure and disappointment.
This is life.

We can attempt, prepare and project future outcomes.
But in truth we are truly helpless and feeble and totally dependent.

To some, my statement may seen dismal and negative. But for others who have known the true state, their true fragile and weak position, it is life.

How so? Well, let me tell you about the thing that makes my statement not so dismal at all.

When one knows the Maker of it all, the Creator or heaven and earth, one’s perspective changes.

I can be weak. For I rely on His strength.

But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is perfected in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly in my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest on me.
2 Corinthians 12:9

I can be lacking in earthly wealth.
At times perhaps, I have  experienced some need. Others may see me as poor.

But when I consider the Gift of My Lord…
“Blessed are the poor in spirit, For theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”
Matthew 5:3

I have all I need.
The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
Psalms 23:1

If, I stop and consider my loss and those whom I have cried in grief for, I could become overwhelmed. Yet, When I stop and consider that The Lord sent me His Holy Spirit and that He is with me, He is my Comforter.

Blessed are those who mourn, For they shall be comforted.
Matthew 5:4

Then when those moments come where I look about me and I think about the evil and the wickedness in the world. I then have an opportunity to bow before my Lord and pray. There, before the throne of grace, I find my peace.
When I pray and seek God’s presence and ask Him to have his way in me. I am blessed.

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, For they shall be filled.
Matthew 5:6

The Lord is my light and my salvation; Whom shall I fear? The Lord is the strength of my life; Of whom shall I be afraid? When the wicked came against me To eat up my flesh, My enemies and foes, They stumbled and fell. One thing I have desired of the Lord, That will I seek: That I may dwell in the house of the Lord All the days of my life, To behold the beauty of the Lord, And to inquire in His temple.
Psalms 27:1‭-‬2‭, ‬4

I look to the one who sustains all things and in Him I find my hope in.

My Lord Jesus, is the Strength of my Life.

I would have lost heart, unless I had believed That I would see the goodness of the LORD In the land of the living.

Wait on the Lord; Be of good courage, And He shall strengthen your heart; Wait, I say, on the Lord!
Psalms 27:13 – 14

Yes, I am not dependent on my own self.  If there is any good in me, it is because of God’s mercy and grace.

I understand that every good gift comes from the Father of Light.

James 1:17 says,
Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning. – King James Version

In a different version it lays it out in this way,

Every desirable and beneficial gift comes out of heaven. The gifts are rivers of light cascading down from the Father of Light. There is nothing deceitful in God, nothing two-faced, nothing fickle. – The Message

This means every part of my life that has brought a benefit and a blessing has He given to me.

He doesn’t change His mind about loving me. He doesn’t abandon. He doesn’t change his purpose.

His desire is that I may delight in Him.

I know this because His word tells me so.

He put it in writing…
Its a document I can go to and secure in my mind daily.

In Zephaniah 3:17 God’s word shows me these lines. I xhose this Amplified version so you can read it for yourself.

The Lord your God is in your midst, A Warrior who saves. He will rejoice over you with joy; He will be quiet in His love [making no mention of your past sins], He will rejoice over you with shouts of joy.

Could you stop for a moment and consider How much in love God is with us.
He sings over us.
He delights in spending time with us.

In the Book of Jeremiah it is there written for us to go to and glean a greater understanding. 

The Lord has appeared of old to me, saying: “Yes, I have loved you with an everlasting love; Therefore with lovingkindness I have drawn you.
Jeremiah 31:3 – King James Version

I will share a bit of my story with you.

I was married to a man who said, He married me to do me a favor. He said, I was good for no one else.  His words made me feel degraded and low. He said, if I had accomplished anything at all, it was because of him. According to him, I was worth nothing.

Though he would go through bouts of depression and then later, say, he did not mean those things he had said. After many years, his words began to stick. I began to think, I held no value. I was constantly trying to do more and to be more and to strive to do kindness and always try to do my best in so many areas of life, as to somehow, gain his respect and love.
The truth is, he was a wounded man that could not truly understand love. 
He attended church and performed many kind acts in public. Only to eventually, go back and feel that his life did not matter. He needed God’s love. We cannot earn it. We cannot try in our own strength or ability to be good enough. We will soon tire of it.

The effect that had on me, was a life of an emotional roller coaster.
I felt I had no worth, no matter how often I spoke about God’s love. I deeply wanted God. But felt the pain and rejection and hatred I experienced through this man. Somehow I thought this all meant God was not happy with me.

It wasn’t until the time came where the relationship was too violent and dangerous for me. I had to part ways. Heart broken and feeling empty and lost. Loving someone who could not love me back was a sad life. One I had chosen for myself.

Then that still small voice of God’s Holy Spirit reminded me of God’s unmerited favor.
God’s love does not require me to earn it.
You and I can never earn it with works.
But we can have it and experience it freely.

Again, it is written in God’s  word. I can read it daily.

For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.
John 3:16 NKJV

All I had to do was turn to God’s love. He did not walk away from me. He was ready and able to save.

Today, I do not rely on my own capacity to thrive.

I live under the shadow of the Almighty.
Psalm 91:1

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:6 -7

Christ Jesus keeps my heart at peace.
I know God loves me regardless of my shortcomings.
And even my worst sin he has washed away.

The proof is again, right there in God’s word. This way, if we forget it, we can go to it and read it for ourselves.

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. Now all things are of God, who has reconciled us to Himself through Jesus Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation,
II Corinthians 5:17‭-‬18 NKJV

The Father reconciled us to himself through Jesus, His Son.

Christ died to blot out my sins. And restore me and you to a right relationship with God.

In Christ Jesus I am made worthy. In Him I am set free.  In Him I am loved.
I depend not on my own abilities. No, no, no.

I completely depend on the one who has loved me from the beginning.

Yes, I can go on forever.
Imagine the yarn in hand. Imagine the needles and the hands slowly knitting a materpiece.
Yes, I am just that in Christ.
You see God loved you and me long before we even had access to His unsearchable grace. His unaccecible light was made apparent to us in Jesus Christ. He is the Light of the world. He himself, the very creator of the universe cares about you and me.

I will show you.
Look at how scripture shows us.

O Lord, You have searched me and known me. You know my sitting down and my rising up; You understand my thought afar off. You comprehend my path

and my lying down, And are acquainted with all my ways. For there is not a word on my tongue, But behold, O Lord, You know it altogether. For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother’s womb. I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well.
Psalms 139:1‭-‬4‭, ‬13‭-‬14 NKJV

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was in the beginning with God. All things were made through Him, and without Him nothing was made that was made. In Him was life, and the life was the light of men.
John 1:1‭-‬4

I must stop here. But to tell of His love and His mercy is now ever more delightful.
For I understand that I could do nothing to earn it. But God still loves me.
We could so nothing to keep our own life. Our very existence is in his hands.
Yes the oxygen in your lungs and in our atmosphere is all his doing.

So, I do not care about being self sufficient.
I am happy with bring Totally Dependent on the One who has loved us with an everlasting love.

All I had to do was confess Him as my Lord and turn away from my wayward heart. Tell Him how sorry I was for not trusting and surrendering to Him. And this Belief in Jesus and accepting His forgiveness has made me new.

I pray you can see it in the written form. I pray I was able to communicate some of His love for you.

He loves you.
I am absolutely sure of it. I know I am profoundly loved by God, in His Word is my proof.

If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
I John 1:9 NKJV

He loves you too.

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